鄧永鏘（DavidTang）中國會、上海灘創辦人

Lastmonth,oneofmybestfriendsdiedfromastroke.Athisfuneral,hiscoffinfilingoutthechurchwastouchinglyfollowedbyhisdogs.Icouldn'tholdbackandburstintotears.InChinese,wesay"betterforaherotoshedbloodthantears"（英雄流血不流淚）-soIseemedtohavefailedasahero.Thewholemoribundeventalsogotmethinkingaboutthefrailtyoflife.IwasgoingtoseemyfriendonthatfatefulFridaymorning.Thenontheday,hewassuddenlytakentohospital.Hehadastrokebeforelunchandwent.Ishallmisshim.ItalsogotmethinkingifIhavehadagoodlifeandthatif,godforbid,Iwassuddenlytogo,whetherIwillhavelivedadecentlife.IknowitisnotveryChinesenorgoodfung-shui（大吉利是）tothinkaboutsuchthings,butsometimes,itispointlessbeingtoosuperstitious,asitbecomesescapism.
Onthewhole,IbelieveIhavehadawonderfullife:Ihavehadagoodfamily,particularlyawonderfulgreat-grandmother,atrulyexceptionalgrandmother,andamotherandawifewhocouldnothavegivenmemorelove.Ihavealsomadesomelife-longfriends-friendswithwhomIhavelaughedandcriedandarguedanddebatedandtravelledandsleptandhuggedandeatenanddrunkandplayedandgambledandquarrelledandmade-upandquarrelledagain-andallthethingswhichgothroughthespectrumoftruefriendship.Ihavealsoloved,beenloved;gonethroughunrequitedlove,bothways,andcontinuetobeabletoloveandbeloved.IhavehadamarvellouseducationandtheluckiestdispositionofbeingcurioussothatIcarryonwantingtolearnmoreandknowmoreandexperiencemore.Mytwochildrenareasgoodastheycome-unspoilt,inpossessionofgoodmanners,welleducatedandknowthevaluesoflife.Ihaveseensomewonderfulsceneriesinmylife-Kilimanjaro,theTibetanplains,Bhutan,EasterIsland,theVanDiemen'sLandinTasmania,thegeysersatIceland,andthedepthofBavaria,alongtheoldSilkRoute,alltheancientcitiesofIndia,andtheSeychelles,theMaldives,mostoftheSouthSeaislandsandAlaskaandtheYellowMountains.Ihavealsohadmyfairshareofmeetingsomeamazingpeople.LordDenning,whenhewasMasteroftheRolls,putmeinutterawewhenIsawhimincourt;RichterplayingRachmaninoffreducingmetotears(again);smokingacigarwithFidelCastro;havingdinnerwithjustStevenSpielberg,TomHanks,TomCruiseandNicoleKidman,withChrisdeBurghplaying"LadyinRed"afterwards;takingPrincessMargaretshoppingintheChineseEmporium;watchingDonGiovannionNewYear'sDayatLaScalawithIsaiahBerlin;talkingaboutthewarwithFreddieAyerandRoaldDahlwhoslepttogetherinthebasementoftheDorchesterHotel;goingontotheroof-top,shoelesswithPrincessDiana,ofStMarco'sinVenice;watchingMickJaggerperformwithBillClintonoff-stage;beingattheQueenMother's100thbirthdayparty;andsunbathingwithKateMoss!

Ihavealsoreadsomewondrousbooks(TheGreatGatsby,Ulysses,HowardsEnd,LaugherintheDark,OJeeves),seensomeextraordinaryfilms（UnChienAndalou,IlPostino,SomeLikeItHot）andoperas（TheRingatBayreuthandCoventGardenandMozartatSalzburg）,gonetosomesensationalconcerts（BerlinPhil,ViennaPhil,SoltiandKarajan）,andseteyesonavastnumberofpaintingmasterpieces（TheLastSupper,Gas,TheMonaLisa）.Ihavealsoeatenfoodasgoodasnectar,drunkwinesfromthemostdeliciousofgrapes,absolutelysuperiorabalonesandsharksfinsandbirds'nest.Ihaveflowninthebestplanesandsailedonthemightiestboats.Ihaveseenthebestraces（withtherocketNijinsky）andsomeofthebestgamesinourtimes（Nastasiv.SmithatWimbledonandEnglandwinningTheFootballWorldCup）.IthankgodeachdayforallthegoodthingsIhaveenjoyedaswellasalltheexperienceswhichhavebeensublimeandindelible.Itreasureeachday,andtrytomakethemostofwhatIcangetoutofit.IoftencannotbelievehowfortunateIhavebeen.Theconstellationhasblessedme,andthat'swhyIfeelImustgivebackwhatIhavetakenfromlife.That'swhyallofusmustalwaysremembertohelpothersandimpartwhatknowledgeandexperienceswehavehadtothosewhohavenotbeensofortunate.Theworldgoesroundbecauseofpeoplegiving.Weshouldneverforgetthatwhenwego,wearewhatwehavegiven,ratherthanwhatwehavereceived.Forreceiptdependsonprovidence,whilstgivingdependsonourfreewill.That'sthebeautyandmysteryoflife.
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